Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(770): View more from Georgia

Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.

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(360): View more from Washington

The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...

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(570): View more from Pennsylvania

I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money

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(301): View more from Maryland

I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.

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(913): View more from Kansas

Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.

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(918): View more from Oklahoma

I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.

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(703): View more from Virginia

i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.

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(702): View more from Nevada

Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.

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(209): View more from California

Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis

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