smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.
This morning I saw a frozen puddle in front of my RA's door and I laughed, assuming someone poured water in hopes that she would slip and fall. That's when my roommate told me I had peed there last night. Thank you Captain Morgan!
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
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