I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
She said her name was "party"
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Randomize
