Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
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