fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
Randomize
