it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
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