and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
I cant believe that bitch gave me herpes. she said those bumps were just a part of the natural landscape
wait, did she really refer to her vagina as a landscape?
why are you more concerned about her word choice than the fact that I HAVE FUCKING HERPES
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
Randomize
