i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
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