thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
stop texting me about your public sex.
says she who narrated getting eaten out in a movie theatre over text to me
Randomize
