I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
Randomize