ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
mom asked me why i'm never sober at family events, i told her i learned it from her.
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
where are my pants?
in the oven.
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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