You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."
so im guessing thats a no.....
I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
and I'm going to name my autobiography "blow jobs with enthusiasm are the best"
I'm naming my autobiography "Reasons Not to Date Girls From Texas."
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
Randomize
