At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
She's better-looking with the mask on.
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