how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
i really thought "pants-shitting drunk" was an unreachable level until last night
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize