Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
Hold on...did you Instagram a picture of you and your boyfriend while you were sending me dirty snapchats?
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
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