Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
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