she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
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If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
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