Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
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