we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
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