just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
A cab driver remembered me by name, address, and ex fuck buddys nick name from a year ago. I mustve been one memorable shit show.
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
I just called my kid butt plug. Does that make me a bad mommy??
This may be the most diplomatic thing you've ever said
Randomize
