I think my fart just growled at me.
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
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