well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
Randomize
