Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
Babe! I just farted and I swear to jesus lord christ that it sounded like ur name! Ok, more like Meeatt but still... awesome.
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Randomize
