I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
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