I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
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