So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
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