Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
My wrist bandage is guacamole stained. What an accurate representation of my life as a whole
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
Randomize