Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
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