I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
I'm high, watching "Scream" and eating a grilled cheese sandwich off my boobs. I'm not going anywhere
Come on, clusterfuck. Put on a pushup bra and get your fine ass to the bar, or you will be a sad single stoner forever
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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