And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
