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  • Submitted by grandmasboy on Dec 11, 11 at 12:23pm

    Now that's the way to keep kids from behaving badly! And no one ever said Santa wasn't armed, dude runs around in a fancy ass sled with a giant bag full of presents. You need protection for that shit.

  • Submitted by Dr_Rod on Dec 11, 11 at 11:12am

    Destroying little kids' innocence one screwed up story at a time lmao

  • Submitted by ColinD1 on Dec 11, 11 at 12:15pm

    Instant favorite, I just got yelled at at work for 'playing with my phone' for laughing at this one

  • 88 58
    Submitted by Jennamatic_3000 on Dec 12, 11 at 12:17am

    And little Timmy's parents never had to punish him again...\n\nBecause he hanged himself from the shower rod.

  • 87 79
    Submitted by TubeSounding on Dec 11, 11 at 2:18pm

    Was it Beyonce's baby?

  • 77 64
    Submitted by cali_girl_07 on Dec 11, 11 at 11:53am

    Fucking awesome post!

  • 71 62
    Submitted by Dannynickpags789 on Dec 12, 11 at 7:32pm

    Bahahahahahahahahhaha pissed my pants

  • 68 56
    Submitted by Captn_Crouton on Dec 11, 11 at 9:28pm

    Awesome.

  • 69 60
    Submitted by Hadouken on Dec 11, 11 at 8:46pm

    Just epic.

  • 70 62
    Submitted by debi888 on Dec 11, 11 at 11:54am

    I love this!

  • 66 70
    Submitted by porksword on Dec 11, 11 at 2:01pm

    Yeah, then he WALKED away...

    • 77 58
      Submitted by 007Archer on Dec 13, 11 at 2:55am

      Trying desperately to keep the straight face till he was back in a car...

  • 64 70
    Submitted by powerstrokeguy on Dec 11, 11 at 11:58pm

    Epic Winning

  • 62 67
    Submitted by anfernysukka on Dec 13, 11 at 5:40pm

    ZING! Total badass.

  • 62 71
    Submitted by cfreymarc on Dec 12, 11 at 8:59am

    If you weren't on the naughty list, you just made it.

  • 50 67
    Submitted by ThiraFool838 on Dec 14, 11 at 2:11am

    You are my hero sir!!