I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
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Now that's the way to keep kids from behaving badly! And no one ever said Santa wasn't armed, dude runs around in a fancy ass sled with a giant bag full of presents. You need protection for that shit.
Destroying little kids' innocence one screwed up story at a time lmao
Instant favorite, I just got yelled at at work for 'playing with my phone' for laughing at this one
And little Timmy's parents never had to punish him again...\n\nBecause he hanged himself from the shower rod.
Fucking awesome post!
Was it Beyonce's baby?
I love this!
ZING! Total badass.
Bahahahahahahahahhaha pissed my pants
If you weren't on the naughty list, you just made it.
Yeah, then he WALKED away...
Trying desperately to keep the straight face till he was back in a car...
You are my hero sir!!