why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
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