What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
that's like... drinking popov and saying its the worlds best vodka. you gotta try some others first. THERE SHOULD BE A MISS AMERICA PAGEANT. but like, mr penis. and they can do tricks and make unintelligent remarks and wear sparkly condoms.
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
Randomize