I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
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