While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
