Well douche your snatch and let's go!
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
