I woke up wearing no shirt sleeping next to a half-eaten grilled cheese.
Well did you call the grilled cheese yet? Or r u waiting the usual 3 days?
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
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