You really coming over, don't trick.
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
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How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
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I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
I'm talking to this guy I met online about French toast. I am the oddest fucking combination of hungry and horny. Wtf brain.