If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
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