me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She throws back shots like they are NO-THING. I swear, she goes through like five straight tequila shots, does a jello shot, chases with half a hot dog, has a rum and coke, and then takes her shirt off and makes an impromptu bandage out of it for fuckin' Tim who cut himself on the flagpole. I'm going to marry her.
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
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