Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
She guessed my name 9 times, and 5 of those times she guessed Mike. Figured that'd be an easy target for the night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
Omg I joined a choir last night...
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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