i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
Randomize
