You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
Turns out the bartender I fucked is the bar owner. WHY THE FUCK DO I PAY FOR HALF MY DRINKS? IS SEX NOT TIP ENOUGH?
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