Hey it's Austin.
I am not drunk enough for this conversation.
It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
Randomize
