Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
Randomize
