I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
I love you like a cupcake loves an overweight child, very similar to the mannerisms of a whole cake but personal, and minus the commitment issues, plus just the right amount of icing; not to mention the convenience of mobility, and only a smidgen of the guilt😘
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
I forgot drug dealers have families, too. Cheers to a sober, uncomfortable, slightly enraging Thanksgiving.
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
Randomize
