im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
Randomize
