i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
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