Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
and i looked up. we had an audience...
i don't want a singing card. it disturbs my hangover. give me a pack of cigs taped to a bottle of wine and fuck me without a condom. happy vday baby.
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
Randomize
