when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon...
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
